Creative Writing


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#14: 7 July 2021
"Airborne Transmission"
The tailgate reads "CLEMENTINE", as in O My Darlin'. Every detail of the monster is oranger-than-orange, a gradient array of shades, from the carpet to the upholstery to the driver's shades. Really fucking orange.

#13: 31 June 2021
"Grilling Lessons"
I'm at the pool fumbling with an umbrella. My permanent lack of comfort here has me permanently sunglassed and I smell like classic Dude Stew, body odor, suntan lotion and vape fumes.

#12: 24 June 2021
"Outside Lagunitas Grocery"
"Be Prepared" by Vera Brosgol is a graphic novel that tells the story of her experiences at a Russian sleepaway camp in the wilderness of Connecticut.

#11: 16 June 2021
"It Comes From Modena"
Born near the ocean with no mountains in sight. I believe I can see clear across the world.

#10: 09 June 2021
"A Different Knob"
It's part of your job to speak to people up close," he says, dropping a tin of mints on my desk. It strikes, and a pleasantly resonant rattling sound rings out. It takes its time to get to silence. I look up and smile.

#09: 02 June 2021
"Seven Restaurant Reviews"
Thousands of pinholes ripple across a deep gray-black background, releasing faint beams of pure white light, until the whole scene is gently washed away and replaced with the visual confirmation that I’ve just been punched in the face...

#08: 26 May 2021
"No Flowers"
I open my curtain and the sky is bright blue. Very few clouds. I stretch and sit in front of my computer. Turn on the screen. It’s covered with Instant Messages....

#07: 19 May 2021
"How Not to Impress a Magician"
The word that makes me realize I don’t know every word is abattoir...

#06: 12 May 2021
"Something Invisible"
Scotty McTape, the rascally-but-helpful, tartan-clad, kilt-wearing kid, was the 1940s era mascot for 3M’s adhesive products, which were named "Scotch" to invoke a stereotype based on Scottish nationality...

#05: 5 May 2021
"We All Grow Eyes"
In the early 90s on Sundays my Dad and I drive into Manhattan from south shore Long Island to do the one thing we can always do happily together — eat...

#04: 28 April 2021
"The Taste of the Himalayas"
I thought Coors Light tasted like Nag Champa from the age of 13, when I took my first sip in my friend George’s room, suffocatingly thick with smoke from incense...

#03: 21 April 2021
"Preserved Lemons"
The first time I dropped a mug and broke it, I was shocked by the lack of drama. Thick, factory made ceramic breaks nothing like dropping a glass...

#02: 14 April 2021
"Built for Dreaming"
I learn how to ride a bicycle when we remove my training wheels and my brother balances me at the top of the driveway and lets me go...

#01: 07 April 2021
"10 Rules for Editing Personal Essays"
Caring for a Raspberry bushes is confusing — they’re not like other plants. Applying the same rules to Rubus that you do to any other plant is asking for trouble...

Venice, CA, June 14, 2021 Self Published
"Trust me: you don't want a castle." Published by Rejection Letters, 3/2021.